Jessica_Print_079_resized.jpg

Jess Milanes

Fertility Coach

I help women boost their fertility and get pregnant!

 
 
It's time to start having fun again. Stop the stress of trying to conceive Feel balanced and happy Get pregnant. (2).png
 
 

Are you thinking about getting pregnant? Or maybe you’ve been trying and still haven’t gotten your positive test yet?

Girl, I feel you.

The fertility journey is rough but you don’t have to do it alone!

I help women boost their fertility and get that big fat positive on their pregnancy test.

Jessica_Print_030.jpg
 

Follow me on Instagram

I have issues with fitting in. 99% of the time I’m actually pretty happy that I march to the beat of my own drummer. I can be goofy, get shit done, and say weird things. But there’s something about the “mom club” that makes me feel desperate to join. The comments of… “One day when you’re a mom, you’ll understand” Or “You should feel lucky that you don’t have to worry about this” Or “Wait until you’re kid poor” I know they’re not said to be mean but they can be daggers to the gut. I want to know what that feels like And when those words are spoken it is a reminder that I’m not yet there. I’m not yet a mom. At least not in their eyes. Photo by @tayloredphoto
Bitter doesn’t look good on you. It’s so easy to be bitter when trying to conceive and everyone around you seems to be having a baby effortlessly. The truth is, you don’t know their story. They may have had challenges trying to conceive too but they were too scared to talk about it. Or maybe they weren’t expecting this pregnancy and now they are freaking out. Or maybe they did get pregnant with ease. Good for them! The thing that I’ve learned about my bitterness or resentful attitude towards other couples getting pregnant “faster” than we are, is that it’s a cover for something deeper. It’s a cover for feelings of inadequacy. Feelings of unworthiness. It’s another way to judge my body for not being “good enough.” How is that working out for you? Have you ever hated your body to happiness? I know I sure haven’t. I’m not saying that release and love is easy. It isn’t. It will take you to a dark place. Likely darker than you have ever been. But girl, the freedom on the other side is worth it. I don’t feel bitter when I see pregnancy announcements any longer. Full transparency: I am working through my feelings of inadequacy in my body. But I will tell you this… I’m not hiding from these emotions any longer. I’m here to be the biggest hype girl around. I’m here for you. I’m here for me. Photo by: @tayloredphoto
Aren’t you tired? Girl, lemme tell you a little secret. Part of me doesn’t really even want to admit this but…here it goes. I am exhausted. And I am exhausted because I am releasing something amazing into the world but it takes so much energy. This podcast is like my baby and it made me think about how we do this when we’re trying to get pregnant. The initial “go” conversation that you have with your partner is so exciting. You start out and decide to do EVERYTHING you can at once to make a baby as fast as possible. You download all the apps, track your temp, baby dance every day, pee on god knows how many sticks, and you just feel so freaking good about it. Then the first, second, third cycle pass and….nothing. No big fat positive for you. You are devastated because you start seeing the pregnancy announcements. Burning fast and bright is never going to bring you the long term satisfaction of what you want. It’s the fast lane to the land without light or hope. I’ve talked to 11 women in less than two weeks. I still work full time. I maintain my health. I try to be a good wife. I try to be a good friend/sister/daughter. It’s been a lot. But in the interim I forgot to take care of me. I was so consumed in the excitement that I didn’t set boundaries. I didn’t give myself space. What I’m trying to say here is this: give yourself space. Take this time to learn what you need to do to fill up your cup because once you have that baby you’ve wished for, the learning curve is only going to be that much steeper. I birthed this podcast into the world and I am so excited and happy and in love with it. But I lost myself in it and now I’m coming back.
This is no longer my secret. I’m on here telling every woman to know that she’s not alone. To speak up. To speak her truth. But I wasn’t really doing that 100% yet. Today I told my parents about this account and my podcast. I don’t know what I was waiting for. Actually, I do. I was afraid that I would be judged. That I would be told not to air my dirty laundry. That I’m going to get my feelings hurt. That it’s too difficult to start a business. That I should stick to just doing my 9-5 job. Instead I got unconditional support. Holy shit you guys. If this ain’t a metaphor, I don’t know what is. How many times have you been afraid to speak up and out about your health? How many times have you actually been supported when you thought you were going to be lectured/judged? If the answer to the second question is a lot, then I got you girl. We do not judge here. I may come off with some tough love (hello enneagram 8) but trust me it is coming from love and not from judgment. What do you want to share so that you can be free from the judgment? Send me a DM or comment below. You are loved. You are worthy. You are not alone.